Argh

Mr Chow Hoo Keen. May I ask what the hell is wrong with you? Why can't you bring yourself to focus, concentrate and STUDY?!

I do realize the importance of this January exam. It's the REAL thing! Yet I can't seem to concentrate because when I did, I fell asleep. Just the kinda attitude to have before a major exam.

Four days. It's the fourth day I've been studying and I'm still at chapter one. WHY CAN'T I MOVE A LITTLE BIT FASTER!

Okay this is absurd. I'm being angry at myself and expressing my anger at my blog when I am the one to blame. ABSURD!

I really prefer Math. No reading required! )x

*edit*

I'm now feeling a lot of anger and hatred and I need an outlet.

WOOHOO~

I PASSED! 47/50! For a while i thought i failed because i didn't know how to read the results. But YAY! To award myself, i bought a burger and a sundae cone from McD. And also because my stomach started growling halfway through the test. BUT I PASSED!

Anyway, that dude was really nice. A nice guy to talk to. I like nice people. They're hard to find but they are out there. People like me. :D

And I am in Christmas spirit now! NOTHING SHALL BRING ME DOWN! ROAR!

Reminiscence

There is this guy I know back in high school. He was a great friend of mine.

The special thing about him is, he has a very good personality which makes me respect him a lot. Like, seriously, a lot. He has very good instincts, which comes from his maturity. The way he handles stuffs, knowing which is more important and which should be tended to first, always helps in solving whatever conflicts or problems his friends face. His presence always brings comfort, if not bliss.

He is a leader, the kind of leader who understands his subordinates' needs, the kind of leader who considers what his peers want. He listens, patiently, and understands, and therefore he does not rush into conclusions. Yes, mistakes are unavoidable. But he learns from them, he learns from them well and hard. He doesn't let mistakes pull him down. He ponders and wonders and makes sure that none of the mistakes he has made would ever be repeated, because he knows that mistakes that have been made can only be blamed on no one but himself.

He sometimes takes things too hard and too personally. When something bad happens, he would put the blame on himself, he would punish himself, and it is hurtful to the people around him to see him doing that to himself. But time washes all pain away, and he will regain his composure, becoming a better man. And this is one of the main qualities a leader should have, in my opinion, to know when he's at fault, to not to be too proud, and to know when to recover from mistakes.

One other important thing about him is, he really takes care of his friends. He has the ability to make his friends feel good no matter when or where, especially when his friends are in an awkward situation. He always have this trust in everyone to be a good person. And hence his optimism always brightens people's lives. Even if his friends have taken the wrong path in life, or swayed away from their original goal, he would try hard to lead them back, even if he has to do it slowly and patiently. This is the main reason why i really respect him.

Friend, you are really a great guy. I'm so glad that you're part of my life. And at this moment, i miss you.

(=

And i hope i can be more like you. Because i know i am not, and it's not easy for me to be, a person like you, to prioritize your friends and family before yourself. And also because, i look up to you.

Though it's like super early till your birthday, i would just like to wish you happy birthday in advanced, my friend .

=)

Skate to insanity

Ice skating rocks. I finally can move on the ice without holding on to the sides. So happy with myself. But Jordan and Joshua were really good! It was their first time but they skated better than me O_O (i should probably feel ashamed hehe) Too bad Caleb didn't join or i could have enjoyed pulling him down with me :D

LOVE ICE SKATING NOW! Can't wait for the next time! Though it hurts my wallet to say so.

Oh and Sakae (or according to someone, SAKAI) Sushi sucks. :P

DENISE CALEB JOSHUA HENGCHOC JORDAN CENGCENG JOY i just want to say that i really enjoyed myself yesterday HEHE!

THANKS FOR THE FUN!

*edit*

Oh The Next Three Days is not a bad movie to watch! Maybe i got attracted because of one of the reviews i read - Russell Crowe is really a good actor! Though there wasn't much conversation going on but his facial expression really delivered the message of the movie. His anxiety, anticipation, long for hope, happiness, all can be seen on his face. Overall, not a bad movie to watch.

Where do I stand?

I remember there's a theory which goes like this : If one behaves extraordinarily outgoing and attention-seeking, there's actually something that one wants kept hidden.

I guess i know how that feels. And i guess i also know how unhealthy that behavior is. One might not care what one would do, one might even hurt people around one, at the expense of behaving more outstandingly. It's a subconscious behavior, i might add.

Not trying to be defensive though. Just thought of..typing out my thoughts out loud.

I wonder why, though i want to channel my extra energy and focus on somewhere other than what's on my mind, i can never concentrate them on my mountain-high load homework. Heck, i feel like going out so often, i think my financial supply can no longer keep up with my personal demands!

What happened to the composed and responsible one?

Who knows.

By the way, i am not even sure that one knows what one wants hidden in the first place. What a funny situation.

Iran Exhibition

Saw it on newspaper the other day and the only attraction, in my opinion, was IRANIAN FOOD! So i promised myself to "drop by". So i had the chance today to go all the way to KLCC. BUT THEN! It was kinda disappointing! :(

Well two of the halls are allocated for the Property Fair and another two was for the Iran Exhibition. There were MANY people in the property fair but then the Iran exhibition was close to empty.

The moment i entered the hall, i saw many many carpets and somehow it immediately reminded me of Aladdin. Some of the carpets are handmade and it's SO SO nice! I wonder how long it takes for them to make such huge and nice carpets.

There weren't much things by the way. There were some carpets, furniture, ceramic deco, some medical equipment, communication technology and VERY VERY little food! ): I really expected to have some, probably, exotic delicacies or something because i thought since it's an exhibition, they should show something special and outstanding. (that's what i thought of Iranian food hehehe) BUT THEN the only edible stuffs i saw were some jam and honey. NOTHING EXOTIC! ):

And i finished walking one round in less than 10 minutes. =.=

But it's probably because i reached at around 5, which was kinda late. But but but, still, it's so sad! ):

I WANTED TO EAT IRANIAN FOOD! ):

Oh but one thing i realized was, Iranian guys are really really tall. I mean, the shortest ones that i saw are my height. But they all normally at least one head taller than me! HUMONGOUS PEOPLE! What do they normally eat huh? I felt like a dwarf there! ):

But I had fun nevertheless :D

Hanging by a very thin rope.

(Referring to the rope) My tension is so great, necking actually occurs at the middle of the rope.

Okay that's super random. I just wanted to use a Physics term - necking.

ANYWAY, Carrie Underwood is an amazing singer. I've been listening to her song since morning and I have not gotten sick of it, and this rarely happens to other songs. She truly is amazing.

Okay that's random too.

Anyway what's up with life lately?

I was thinking of a way to actually describe my recent life. I failed. And i decided that two words sum it all.

Hmm.

I admit. I am an emotional guy. I think about things over and over again. Anything at all. That makes me a guy who daydreams awfully lot. Therefore, most of the time, I always have the tendency to grab a pencil and write down my thoughts. Yet, every time I try to squeeze my opinions out in my blog, I fail. Writer's block, people say. But, I just fail. However, I do have many things to talk about and to share. My feelings, how I take on stuffs that have been happening around me, my friends, my family and my feelings. There you go, these stuffs are always on my mind.

I guess that sort of makes me a vulnerable guy?

But I am still proud of myself. Thanks to my friends, I know that that does not make me a lesser man. I think about stuffs a lot, ask Fatima. But that only means, I care. And I care, an awful lot, about all of you, and everything that is surrounding you. So stop hinting me that I am not good enough! YOU'VE NEVER TRIED! Damn it.

Food for thought.

Welcome to the Legal Age!

Well to most of my friends, IT'S ABOUT TIME!

Whenever we're 18 (or 17, for that matter), what we would like to do the most is DRIVE! But of course, if you're financially capable, why not just buy a car? *wink* That way you get the absolute freedom any kid would ever dream of!

Anyway, if you're really thinking of buying a new car, or even a second-hand one, why not swing by and look at what's available for you here. There are many Hyundai cars for sale and not only that, there is many information that you can get from these websites.

For a start, there are many Hyundai cars on sale on the website. The more popular ones are Hyundai Sonata, Atos and Matrix. Relevant details such as pricing, age of the cars, condition and extra add-on about the cars on sale can be obtained from the website itself. However, more specific information and details definitely can be acquired by contacting the car owners or the person in charged of the cars personally. Again, contact numbers are available through the website itself. Such convenience is definitely necessary to make the website more user-friendly.

Other than that, they even have Hyundai Getz on sale, which is a very very cute car, if you ask me. The best thing is, there are so many colours to choose from! Though, note must be taken that some of these cars might date quite a while back. But as long as the cars are taken care of seriously and come in good shape, I am sure they are worth the money. (:

The coolest car on sale should be Hyundai Starex, though further information regarding it should only be obtained by ringing the car owner. Hyundai Trajet is also available for sale!

In total, there are only 42 Hyundai cars on sale on site. There should be more incoming requests. And one of the better features is that no matter where you are on Malaysia, you can put your car on sale, or buy a car here because sale knows no boundaries. :)

Sidetrack a little while..

I like you.

But I cannot tell you that I like you.

Why is human feelings so complicated? I wish my feeling is more controllable so that I don't fall for the wrong person at the wrong time.

But I think I do, all the time.

I can only resort to observing you from one corner.

Though, at all times, with my fingers crossed, I always wish somehow you can reciprocate my feelings, and may there be a start.

But, do all wishes come true?

*edit*

There are so many mixed feelings and opinions embedded deep inside my heart. It's like water being heated gently. When it boils, it boils "gently". Like bubbling. It's not vigorous but it's super annoying. And there is no outlet to such mixed feelings and opinions because there is just no suitable outlets considering current circumstances. What happened to the days when friends can just be there for anyone at all to talk about anything at all?

Is it because we've all grown up, we don't talk about our problems?

Is it because if I do share my worries or my opinions, that makes me less than a perfect person?

Or am I just not worthy of anyone's time?

Or am I just no longer worthy of anyone's time?

No implications whatsoever is meant for this post. Merely curious questions being posted "out loud".

I know the world. Suffocated.

*edit*

Or maybe, I just worry that I would burden you, so I resort to burying my worries deep into my fragile heart.

Know no fear

Trials is soon. I have no idea what I am doing here, online, watching dramas and leaving my homework undone. I'm pretty fearless, am i not? I feel guilty yet i take no initiation to study. Maybe like all Initiation process, i need the presence of UV light to become a free radical.

Anyway, Adam Lambert's concert was AMAZING! His vocal range truly has no limit! TOTALLY ASTOUNDING! I am so looking forward to his next album!

I just hope you can notice me more often. That's all.

Flu! Suck my balls!

Terrible. I can't believe i've gotten FLU! At the worst timing ever. I couldn't even muster sufficient energy to open the file containing ALL my maths notes, which means i have not studied tomorrow's C3 test AT ALL. Joy to the world -.-

Anyway I have a question to ask. Who does not like fantasies?

They make the real world looks like hell and therefore give us hope that the world could be a better place! Fantasies are healthy! I hope i get them all the time in my dreams!

And it's REALLY time to study LAR. No matter how much i want to open any of my books to study, i get glued to my lousy laptop instead to watch all the dramas that i've downloaded and will download. IT'S THE DRAMA SEASON OF THE YEAR WAT! Can't blame me! :( I love B&S and GA. B&S sorta defines the dream family anyone of us would want and GA shows that life can always be interesting.

And i actually have something more seriously to blog about but i think with the lack of time and lack of focus my mind can give, i give up. *hopeless*

OH. I AM GOING TO ADAM LAMBERT'S! YAY! Well if you're reading this and you want to go too and you don't know how to get tickets, BUY! xP Or i hope FlyFm is still giving out tickets to his concert. CAN'T WAIT!

*screams*

If only the world knew what I just did, I WOULD NO LONGER NEED TO STEP OUT FROM MY ROOM.

It's friggin' embarrassing! I hope no one finds out. Yet it's thrilling! And MOST IMPORTANTLY I got what i wanted! AND I WANTED IT VERY BADLY!

Thank you, God.

You started my day well, put me through a challenge and ended my day with nothing but bliss. Thank you. (:

UNKNOWN, HERE I COME!

Thank You.

As a person, we often do not realise what others have sacrificed for us or what others had to sacrifice for us. We often take things for granted. We often think that ignorance is bliss. And therefore, often we think wrong. Nothing in this world should be treated with lightly and taken for granted. Everything happens for a reason and with a reason. We should therefore respect what others do, if not caring about them.

Sometimes this sudden thoughts hit me so strongly i think it's an act of..nature or magic. Or God. Or maybe it's just that little pure subconscious voice in my head nudging and urging me to do the right thing. But what mom has been doing recently cannot escape my eyes. After watching Brothers and Sisters, i begin to appreciate what a mother does for her family. Well particularly a single parent. But being a mom, single or not, is really tough. And being a mom to FOUR children, now could be unimaginable.

She does have her own goals for her children - us. But i have to say, not all of us can meet that goal of hers. But nevertheless, i love her. I appreciate the things that she does for us every single day. My heart aches when she's sick or in pain. The image of her legs got cut by a dratted knife still vividly flashes right in front of my mind. Appreciate her. That's what i can do. Because like someone said, we never know what might happen. Later, soon or in the future. Mom, i love you and i love the cakes you bake for us.

With utmost sincere

And i love to watch dramas. Especially those about family and life. Because they make me think about what i have, about everything around me, about myself. They make me appreciate life better. But they've got to be funny, because i will not watch solemn, sad, pathetic shows. :P Though, that would only fit and base on my own definition.

SEPTEMBER OFFICIAL BEGINS!

Sorry Serene and She Mei or Jordan or Kee Onn, your birthdays aren't as important in September as THE BEGINNING OF DOWNLOAD SPREE~ XD

I need a faster speed and bigger space to store all the dramas that i can download with the limited time that i have.

I WANT TO watch dramas endlessly and die laughing!

Oh, tomorrow is Monday again. Bummer.

One of these days, i need to blog seriously

Hope, it lifts me up.

A cheerful day it is. Like what i put at FB status, your actions never failed to catch my attention. Heck, you got me thinking about it almost all day. I don't know if i should do anything. But i hope things will at least be at good terms? :D

By the way everyone should listen to Forget You by Cee Lo Green. The song is named otherwise as Fuck You. It's really cute! And Lilly Allen's Fuck You is cute too i have to admit. But i think Jordan doesn't read my blog so it's okay. :P

Hope to see you tomorrow. :)

End of Holidays

I miss listening to Coldplay late at night and thinking "tomorrow would be a good day". Coldplay just relaxes me, my mind and my body. Sigh, where goes my ipod? I am gonna change my taste for music again.

Have a great day, to whoever is reading. (:

EXAM OVER!

Screw two papers. Gonna pass two papers. Happy? No.

BUT I CAN'T BE ANY HAPPIER TO WELCOME THE RAYA HOLIDAY! I WANNA EAT MANY MANY MALAY FOOOOOOOOOOOD but i'm going to balik kampung too. So no chance i think. :(

HAPPY HARY RAYA TO ALL MY FRIENDS!

*fingers crossed*

May god bless me.

*edit*

你总是为我付出这么多，但我并没信心我能做得最好。我觉得我变得越来越懒散，越来越笨了。很内疚。我并不值得。

Lesson Learned

No matter how tempting something seems to be, it might not turn out to be as pleasurable and enjoyable as we thought it to be. So after one try, one ought to know whether to stop such habit or not. And immediately one should develop a liking or disliking towards such habit. Tsk tsk. I wish i knew better.

Oh yeah. Qualifying test in less than one week. I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED PHYSICS OF CHEMISTRY AND AM HALFWAY DYING IN MATHS. YAY!

New week!

Somehow. Somehow. I feel like using another weekend. The last two days was cramped into doing trigo and trigo alone. And i felt so happy when i finally got in touch with my laptop. And now i'm gonna keep it away for another five days? So sad.

There's so much that i wanna say right now. But but..

I should not say.

HAHA damn random and useless post.

Anyway if you happen to be reading this, i hope you have another wonderful week. (:

Life as We Know It

I really wanna watch that movie. Seems so nice.

But in reality, life isn't exactly how we deem it to be. Most of the time, surprises lunge out of no where to 'ambush' us. Well you can call it 'spices of life' but sometimes the surprises are dreaded ones. We always stumble upon junctions after junctions and we're forced to make choices, difficult or easy, all the time. And we have to live by our decisions with the slightest regret possible because that is life. It's like an escalator, life keeps continuing forward. If we stop or pause halfway to ponder upon our mistakes and misdeeds, we might fall. That's why people keep saying we should always head forward and never look back.

And as usual, that is easier said than done.

It is obviously my stupidity but i often stop and ponder upon my decisions and actions. It helps me to figure if what i have done is right or wrong. Should the same case happens again, what could i have done so that there is a better outcome. These 'analysis' are obviously unnecessary but if you're in my shoes, you would know better.

Being me is not easy because one, i don't even know myself. So how do i expect others to know who i am. And all the time i always wish for the stars. It's about time i slowly wake up from dreams because stars are obviously fantasies and i am in a reality so far away from fantasy, it makes the Sun looks few metres away from me. Second of all, i am just too ignorant. Still too ignorant. I've never learned my previous lessons. Someone seriously need to give me a big fat slap, just to really wake me up.

Sigh. I have too much to complain. But i shall not?

This might be random but..

friends, i miss you.

Looking for a place to stay?

Not my house definitely. :P

But I've recently stumbled across a very useful website to help sort that problem out. It's the right place for anyone to search for a short term rental. It's unbelievably useful because it covers the whole Malaysia so I can actually look for a place to stay anywhere i want. But of course, that is if there are people renting out their accommodation. Supply and demand right?

This website not only helps people to seek for shelter, it also helps people to promote their extra rooms. It currently actually has about 40 thousands offers in the website, which is a lot! So i wouldn't worry about not being able to find a place to stay. The website is pretty easy to use as well. We can narrow down our search based on our needs for example someone would prefer to stay with another Chinese lady so someone would specifically look for such rooms. *wink* But of course if you wanna rent your rooms out you can state your terms down and limit your options to only those whom you favour as a roommate. So it's actually quite convenient.

However the website can definitely be improvised with some ideas. For instance, few photos of the rooms to be rented could be uploaded to give everyone an idea of how the rooms would be like. Sometimes, details of the rooms alone is not sufficient to help me decide if i should rent a specific room. So photos with a wide angle would definitely help. (:

So if you are an independent person looking for a place to stay, i hope this website helps. (:

矛盾

这就是我的处境-矛盾。

或许我已习惯依赖别人，或许我一路来都不理不睬，或是我一路来都没独立过。

我知道我应该感得庆幸，因为，也许这就是改变。

保持乐观，才不会孤单过日子？

我会保持。尽量。不让自己的各种弱点define自己。

McRave @ MCKL

McRave was hot!

Reached KL Sentral for a serious make-up session. The FM crew had fun drawing each other up! In the end we were running late for registration and we ended up really running to college. Pity the girls with high heels, seriously. Haha but i suppose it was all part of the fun? XD

The performances were exciting and dull at the same time. We had our meal at TEN SOMETHING! We could all die from starvation. But the ending part was nice. Loved the dance floor and craziness and hotness under the utter influence of great music! Exhausting but fun! Never had such disco-like excitement before. It was absolutely the sort of stress outlet that we need. (x

Shall we do it again?

Another coveted weekend.

LOVELY WEEKEND!

Though i love my weekdays too, the workload is killing. But thanks to Maths alone, the whole Saturday was spent solving a definite total of more than ONE HUNDRED questions. That excludes the sub-questions falling under each. And i have quite a number of questions left undone. Not that i did not wanna do it, i did not know how to do it. Very annoying.

But I need my free time too, that's why i am here hehe.

Went to Pavillion with the FM gang on Friday after school. Loved the time we spent together and the crazy things we did together. Haha let's do it again! But my financial budget doesn't allow it to be a weekly routine :(((

Okay i shall enjoy my remaining Sunday free time as much as i can. Tomorrow is another hectic day. O.O

May this photo put a smile on everyone's face. (:

Busy busy..

I almost forgot i had a blog.

College is super busy due to MATHS alone. Every weekday i have been doing nothing but maths. Come back from college, maths. Go to college, maths. We have maths every single day. Sigh, i am trying not to sound complaining. Haha.

College is great. I've met great people. And people in college seem to be very smart people! They pick things up very quickly and i am having quite a difficult time to catch up. Shall see how this goes as college life continues.

Just dropped by to say hello to whoever. And will enjoy my life. Like someone said, optimism is really important.

Eh, College Tomorrow?

Haha suddenly everything seems to be happening too soon. Like always, i am not sure if i had enough holidays but i definitely enjoyed my time in Malacca! Guys, we should do that more often! May it be Redang next time! XD

Well, tomorrow is definitely gonna be a Thursday blue for me. I am not even sure if i can wake up early tomorrow! Someone has to blow the whistle to wake me up. Well, i am just gonna enjoy my last night of freedom!

HELLO COLLEGE. I WILL TRY TO ROCK YOU OUT WITH MY OWN WAYS TOMORROW ONWARDS NO MATTER WHAT!

How is PLKN like?

I totally forgot to post about the most fundamental thing about PLKN. What do we do in there?

Well basically during weekdays, we have to wake up as early as 5 because the first roll call starts at 5.30am. The roll call commences with national anthem and PLKN song and bacaan ikrar and bacaan doa. Then we have morning exercises. It's just normal light stretching and sometimes jogging. Nothing much. From 6.30am to 7.30am we're free to take breakfast or take bath or sleep if you want but 7.30am would be the second roll call. Class starts at 8 till 11.30am and there is a short break in between from 9.30am to 10. Example of classes would be about character building, lessons regarding cultures and patriotism.

11.30am would be our lunch time and rest time till 1.30pm. After that, we will have physical activities such as marching or first aid lessons or taekwando lessons or obstacle course and so on. It ends at 3.30pm which would be our tea time till 4.30pm which would be the fourth roll call. After the roll call, we're free to have our riadah time, which to me is a free time to rest or watch tv or talk to friends like crazy! :D Muslims are supposed to gather at 6 for praying while the rests have free time till 7 for dinner. Dinner ends at 8pm and it's time for roll call again.

During the nights, it really depends on the teachers on duty as to what we should do. Sometimes we watched movies or look at the photos that teachers took or we have some interesting pantun sessions. On Thursdays and Fridays nights, we would have kerohanian sessions where we're divided according to our religions and have our religious classes. Around 9.30pm or 10, we'll have our last roll call and then we're free to sleep!

That's basically the routine during weekdays. During weekends, there will be less roll calls and we're free from morning to night unless there are special activities like blood donation or additional talks on certain topics. Donating blood is actually quite fun because i got free food :D

One of the most important things to prepare when you go for PLKN, bring shirts with COLLAR. Don't bring round neck! And you don't really have to bring too many stuffs when you go for PLKN because in the end you'll have extra shirts and pants and shoes to bring back home so it's better you leave extra spaces in your luggage when you enter PLKN camp. Just two cents from me. :D

*edit*

If you have any questions at all regarding National Service, feel free to send me an email or send me a message at facebook. Just tell me who you are and how I could help you. (: Have fun!

About PLKN Still..

I once heard people saying, PLKN could be fun for only one reason, friends. If you've got a bunch of wonderful friends in PLKN, you are extremely lucky. I totally second that saying. I truly treasure the friends that i've got the chance to befriend in Sandakan because they are truly amazing! They brought a new light to my life and they always make each other laugh. They are the best thing that happened in PLKN. Miss you guys!

Anyway just wanna upload a few photos.

During the last night aka the Malam Citra Puisi, my group was the best performance group. At the same time, i was awarded this..

which reads this..

:D And i was the first Chinese ever to win this award in this Kem! :D

Earlier that day, during the closing ceremony, i got this..

which reads this..

:D

I totally didn't expect it because it was never my aim in PLKN. But what the heck? I have my conflicts throughout my time in PLKN so i'll leave it as it is.

PLKN could be one of my craziest decisions because, when i think back, i wouldn't have agreed to join PLKN, much less done any of the activities involved such as PILIHAN RAYA! (The whole process was still very bizarre to me and i still can't believe i broke a record and won, with over 200+ votes or slightly more than 50% of the votes!) So joining PLKN is definitely one of the craziest decisions i've ever made (though possible). The second crazy thing that i've done so far, which is worthy of jotting down, is SHAVING MY HEAD! :D Well, it's not shiny but i still got it shaved. And.. *drum rolls*

Why did i do it? To me, it's the best chance for me to see how i would look like when i'm bald, totally bald. I wouldn't wanna look at it when i'm old so this should be the perfect chance! Plus, it's CRAZY! We should do MORE AND MORE crazy stuffs while we're young! :D I do not regret getting my head bald at all! But i wouldn't show it off when i go out, so stop pulling my cap away! :P

HELLO TECHNOLOGY!

Well, I'm finally back from the dreaded National Service. My camp was in Sandakan and it was called Kem Bagai Budi Resort. Ignore the name because it isn't exactly a resort. It is called National Service after all. :P

Did i enjoy? Of course i did! It was an unbelievable and unforgettable experience. But will i go through it again, given a chance? I have to think twice. If i was not holding any responsibilities, i might have enjoyed it more. Yes i had a post. I was initially the assistant company leader after the first election. We were chosen by our teachers so we didn't really have a choice to reject. Not long after that, my leader left for matriculation in Labuan. So i was promoted to company leader. Then after the second election/promotion, i was chosen to be the Ketua Pegawai Pemerintah aka Penghulu (as how other camp calls it).

Glorious? NO!

With this post and responsibilities, the teachers always kept their eyes on me. At least that's how i felt. I couldn't sleep in class (though i still did because i was too tired :P), I had to be alert all the times just in case I was summoned by any teachers or if there were any fights, i had to wake up early in the morning to wake the others up, i had to rush everyone every time there was a roll call by using a whistle, i had to make sure that everyone's discipline was at a decent level, i had to do what i do or make decisions based on teachers' air muka. It was quite stressful back then. That's why i wouldn't go through it again.

But of course, i learned many things from all the activities that i had, directly or indirectly. And I managed to find my happy moments in the camp, thanks to all my friends who made me laugh and made me stay positive during the rainy days! I would also like to thank my teachers who guided me all the way throughout the whole three months. They are one of the main reasons why the camp could be so fun!

I can't exactly blog about the whole camp i think, it's because my brain has failed me ever since Wirajaya (Wirajaya is the most important activity for the teachers to judge our leadership and our skills to see whether we have learned anything at all after 3 months). But what i can tell is, Sandakan is a really beautiful place. The sky is so blue and the way the clouds are formed is so artistic. The scenery is really heavenly. I miss the sky in Sandakan because there sky in KL is never that blue. If you're looking for a spot for vacation, try Sandakan. :)

Oh it's 11 now. Back in camp, we all had to off the lights in our dorm sharp at 11 or else there would be punishments. So, have a sweet dream :P

Bye Kuala Lumpur

Here i come, Sandakan!

Unbelievable, i am going to Sandakan with KRISHNA! WHAT A COINCIDENCE! At least i have someone i know there! :D Woohoo~

Take care everyone! I will miss all of you people! :D

Good luck to Serene! And Jaarvis too!

Okay good night! See you in June!

Crap, my archive would be ruined with blanks in April and May :(

LESS THAN 24 HOURS AND COUNTING!

Like i said, my eyebrow is longer than my hair. And i actually like it! In fact, i look younger! :D


New monk on the block!

Can't stop scratching my head because it feels so good! Woots!

Okay i don't think i can sleep well tonight.

SANDAKAN! HERE I COME!

To my little brother

Happy birthday! :D

You're finally going to be taller than me -.-

And..

Have fun in your exams! :D

What a day.

I shall sleep early tonight.

National Service is fun. Should be fun. At least that is what i think. It is not that i dislike it but it makes my parents so restless, especially my mum. She could not stop thinking about things to prepare for me and she is making me nervous. As though i have forced this up on her. But truth is, i do not want to bother her at all! I don't want to bother anyone at all. I don't want anyone to go through anything because of me or for my sake. That's why i feel so helpless now, her preparing stuffs that i do not even think of, and me sitting here thinking about what i could do.

I really do not want to trouble anyone at all.

Sigh.

But i am still happy because i got selected to Sandakan!

The main agenda today, the girls did great! There were even better than previous year. So i hope they do not give up because they really are good. Congrats to Rangers and the other winners!

And thanks to the young girls and an old tomato for the huge cardboard. I really don't know what to say. I don't even know some of you but i could probably recognise your face. Hehe. Thank you so so much! I really appreciate your hard work on the card. Thank you!

And, i got Lambert's album today! Finally!

DIE

Few more days left in KL.

Freakin' nervous!

I'M GOING TO SANDAKAN!

It seems so surreal!

And i'm addicted to Timbaland's Scream (featuring Keri Hilson and Nicole Scherzinger). Try listening to it if you are a guy :D

TO YOU. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE

ALL THE BEST AND GOOD LUCK! I KNOW YOU ALL ARE IN BED NOW BUT STILL.. I WISH ALL OF YOU ALL THE BEST! YOU ALL DID GREAT AND YOU ALL WILL DO BETTER TOMORROW!

On bed rest.

Limbs still hurt. :(

I promise i would have a rematch when i come back from NS! ROAR~

Anyway with these kinda weather these days, i wish i could swim all day.

I'm a jogger too!

I jog! Seriously! And i love it! A lot! You know why?

Joggers have better sex lives!

Read more here. :P

I like to jog i jog a lot and i love jogging :D

Grr

I have no idea why the hell am i so nervous and anxious at the same time! There are so many uncertainties right now i just wish to hit the reset button to erase it all off!

11A+ 1A-

Argh, stupid Chinese (subject, not human) If it wasn't for you! But I'm grateful. Thank you.

Thanks to many many people. First of all, thanks to Adam Lambert for his uplifting songs which keep my spirits up when i was studying and Fly Fm for playing so many great songs when i buried my head and brain into a huge pile of Bio, Chem and Phys books. Thanks to all of my friends with whom I studied with throughout the whole SPM period. Thanks to Aunty for all the food she took the time to prepare. Thanks to all the teachers who lent many hands. Thanks to my family. Thanks to everyone who told me that they prayed for me when i was sitting for SPM. Thank you.

Now that SPM is officially over, i can finally let you go. Bye SPM! Love you no more!

Had an amazing day yesterday. Thanks to Garry, Maggie, Serene, Serene, Yee Shan, Ceng Yew and Aunty! Aunty was amazing, she is the new superwoman in my life! And i'm so grateful to have so many great friends, i feel so humble among all of you.

All the best to everyone!

TO ALL MY FRIENDS

THIS IS FOR ALL OF YOU!

ALL THE BEST FOR LATER AND NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, LET IT BE A GOOD STARTING POINT IN OUR LIFE!

Oh it's thursday already?

People dream about their results and hence they have bad dreams. I do have bad dreams but they do not tend to be about the results. I just have these really really bad dreams about what's around me and in the end i wake up to a very, very bad mood. It's very frustrating.

A few extra reasons why i dread tomorrow's coming more than certain people. If the school does announce the results in the hall and announce it like how they did when we were form three, then they would do it according to the order of the classes. And my class starts with C, Cekal. To make things worse, my name starts with C as well. So, i think i have a bit more right to be down right nervous right now. Because i would be one of the first to know my fishing results and i do not want to know my fishing results that soon, in front of everybody. Because once my name gets skipped, i would know what have happened - it was not good enough to be publicly announced to the school's glory. Heck, no matter what my result is, i would still be unsatisfactory because... well, that's how human beings are, aren't they? Human beings are greedy and they wish for better outcomes although normally those kind of outcomes are out of their reach. In this case, i am one of those people. And i can go on and on about this fishing nerves i have now, getting more and more intense as time passes.

And hell on earth, i do not even know what time i should reach school tomorrow!

I hate this week. When will something definite and something good ever happen?

Okay i shall divert my attention, ALL my attention, to Crystal Bowersox!

500TH POST!

And it is dedicated to ALL THE WOMEN FROM ALL AROUND THE WORLD! OR UNIVERSE!

Feel proud! :D

To all the women/female/female-but-not-with-perfect-features I know :P, hope you had a wonderful day!

Nobody said it was easy~

The Scientist by Coldplay. My all time favourite song! It is just so emotional and so meaningful! Just a great song.

Anyway the girls from AI9 did great! Love Crystal! Love Lilly! Beginning to become a fan of Siobhan! Siobhan's last note was CRAZY!

And Katelyn's performance reminded me of how great The Scientist can be, though i did not really like her rendition of the song. It was too slow.

Oh take me back to the start~

There is still hope for the guys!

Am officially a big fan of Lee Dewyze!

He has, in my notion, the most attractive voice in the competition among the guys. People would kill to have that kind of husky voice. He chooses the right songs. He is starting to have the charisma a decent performer should have on stage. He does not have the biggest story from where he comes from. He does not get overly pimped! He does not have the most perfect background. He is just the perfect performer! Am officially a fan of yours, Lee!

Michael isn't bad but he is just not my favourite. He gets pimped too much and his style is a little too weird for me. He was good this week, just not my cup of tea.

Alex Lambert is surprisingly good! He is potentially the real dark horse, though he has a long way to go. But still, he could be good. But get rid of the mullet please.

Casey is a decent singer but not great. Same goes to John Park. But i really need someone to get Todrick and Jermaine out of the competition. Can't stand them. Agreed with the judges, Andrew let us down this week. Not a big fan of Aaron. And Tim should go home next week.

Can't wait for the girls' performances! They're amazing!

Home Security at Risk

Well apparently after your house was once broken into by a completely stranger which caused a lot of money for the "aftermath", you will always be aware of any extraordinary behavior around your neighbourhood. You will always be on the lookout for that mysterious fellow who might break into someone's house again and get him/her caught so that it makes you feel, deep down inside, a little bit better, so that it serves as a punishment to the people who steal from others, so that you will feel deviously happy because the bad guy is screwed.

Whenever a motorcycle slowly passes by, it makes the back of your head tingly and heightens your sense of awareness and initiates the "fight or flight" mechanism in case anything happens - you observe the motorcyclist/s for any suspicious behaviour, if he plans for anything awful. And you can't help it, every motorcycle that passes through in front of your house triggers your curiousity and no matter what you are doing then, you would go out side, take a peek at the motorcyclist and make sure he/she is not onto something bad.

It is a very bad habit but it cannot be changed.

By the way, you is me. And i still curse him, i curse the day he is born, that good for nothing d**khead.

Where is the SPARK?

A too normal opening for the semi-finals for American Idol Season 9, to me. I follow 8tv's AI which is delayed by one day therefore so far I've only watched the girls' performance.

When the judges and Ryan said that this is the season with the most talent and it's the girls' year, i seriously doubt if the girls really of the IT factor. Like most people have said, they have problems with picking the right songs and the rights songs are really important to show how great of a singer and most importantly a performer they are. Star quality is equally crucial at the same time because knowing how to sing in pitch isn't really what AI is looking for anymore. The lack of stardom among the girls this year is really a big disappointment to me. Even some of the early favourites like Katie Stevens are not doing as good as expected. No one wowed me. However i must say a few girls really know who they are as a performer such as Lilly Scott and Didi Benami! Love them both! Lilly's jazzy performance is captivating in my notion because it's refreshing and unique, which i think is what should be brought to this show at this stage. I just love looking at Didi singing, she is so sincere and she is so connected to the songs that she sings. She reminds me of Brooke White except i think that she is even better! One of my early favourites apparently didn't do so well, to my sadness - Janell Wheeler. Well i have to be honest, i am drawn to her in the first place mostly due to her looks than her voice. Hehe. But then she proved that she can sing when she sang American Boy during Hollywood Week. She just has to choose the right songs. I really hope she stays longer in the show. I think many people would like Katie but she is kinda a common and cliche singer. Typical big voice and diva-like singer who can sing the phone book, not so unique anymore, don't you agree? I guess after watching AI for so many years, especially after last year, my taste has changed so much in the sense that i no longer look for decent singers. Adam Lambert has definitely changed the standard.

And, no hope for the guys i think. Hehe.

Happy Birthday Daddy

Dad is finally 55 years old. He is officially a retiree! :(

Dad, wish you healthy, wealthy and happy all the time! :)

Hello to all :D

Back from kampung!

At father's kampung, I realised that i can now hold out longer before passing out after drinking beer, i am quite good at gambling, i eat less during a meal, i eat more frequently, i really like mandarin oranges and i like ice cream!

At mother's kampung, i realised my love for animals, specifically dogs, i found out that my cousin's dog is named Jonnie, my another cousin gave birth to another cute baby boy and i can sleep 6 times a day.

So basically nothing happened :D

But right now i am really REALLY addicted to the prettiest top 24 finalist from American Idol, JANELL WHEELER! Not only does she look pretty, she has a really attractive voice too! LOOK OUT FOR HER! :D

And i think my belly expanded. :(

Happy Chinese New Year

I do not think that i will get access to internet in the next few days so there you have it, Happy Chinese New Year to all of you out there, my friends, seniors, juniors, relatives, everyone whom i know. May the year of tiger and tigress brings you an even better luck than the previous one. And to the skuad kawad, WORK HARD, BEAT THE OTHERS AND BEAT YOURSELF TO BE THE WINNER! :D Anyway i heard that KaHou is very fierce one, is it true? Haha! Okay bye!

Mama Mia~

I think I am capable of many great things. Many great, insignificant things. Like, cooking. :D I have no idea why but I am the one preparing dinner for my family recently. It is not that bad but if someone ask me to prepare dinner, there is one part which i dislike A LOT, that is GETTING THE GROCERIES. I really don't like to go to the market because it is stuffy and there are many people and awful smell which i can still bear but the main problem is to buy, for example, meat, i have to know what kind of meat i want and which part and with or without fat and with or without skin and all crap and it is very troublous! But other than that i am okay i guess. I'm a good cook, you can ask my family. But i think, I THINK, i cook a little bit unhealthily because i put more salt and soya sauce compared to my mom but HEY at least it is tasty! But i should start controlling myself with the amount of salt and sauce i put into the dishes before i bring hazards to my family's health. Wow life must be pretty interesting for me to blog about cooking. -.- Well as a matter of fact, i do have many stuffs undone right now, seeing that CNY is around the corner. CNY is around the corner babeh! Time to increase my savings again! Hooray for that! And i shall be freer after CNY and i shall have more time for THINGS! SO looking forward to these times! Anyway i think FlyFm does not like me because it does not pick up my calls :( And 8tv too! Few weeks ago they were giving away Lambert's debut album and i called and called and called the whole week but none of my calls got through so no Lambert's album for me! :( That's a huge bummer man. :( :( :( Free time's over, time to get back to business.

Ps. No idea why but i really like this photo. Not that anything inside belongs to me anyway.


Till then.

Malaysia Property Website

I have recently found an interesting website about Malaysia Property called PropWall. It is a site about analysis of local property - houses, condo, shops, bungalows - and the first thing about the site which captured my amateurish mind was the beautiful photos of the elegant buildings taken by the members of the site. Not only do the photos essentially display the beauty of local property, they also show the details of each of the property with more emphasis.

Dua Residency, copyright belongs to Ricky Leong at vinleon@yahoo.com

A stunning example, ain't it? The sight of KLCC at the back at night especially makes Dua Residency a cool place to live in. More information can be located at the website.

Along with the photos uploaded by the members in the site, there are also thorough descriptions of the properties in the website where many information can be obtained. These useful information comes in categories and is definitely user-friendly. For instance, if you are interested in Pavilion Residences, via this website, you are able to determine the facilities available in that property and also other relevant information. Not to mention a detailed analysis done by the members which could be a good reference, if not add more new info to your knowledge, to you.

Of course, at the Classified category, you can always find out how much do these properties worth. Such information always comes in handy especially when you decide to get a house for yourself. (:

If you do have any questions at all regarding any properties, the members of the website are always there to clear your doubts at the Answer section. This is indeed very convenient. Of course, to post or to answer any questions, you will have to be a member of this website. But worry not, because this website is absolutely FREE!

If you are interested in real estate, this is certainly a site you must visit.

18SX, or maybe not.

Have you ever seen cats making love?

Well I have not, because they always do it at night, when it is dark outside, and when you want to intentionally search for their love-making spot, you can never succeed because they always have such a good hiding place for their moment.

(Well it is not like i have ever purposely gone looking for their love nest, i am not that desperate for a live p-word, if you know what i mean. Hehe.)

But how do i know that they are making each other feel exceptionally good?

BECAUSE THEIR FREAKING MOANING AND GROANING AND SCREECHING IS NOT THE MOST MELODIOUS THING TO HEAR ON EARTH!

It sounds like baby cry but is not.

It always happens so abruptly, it actually shocked me really bad as i was too absorbed at doing something. Well, the baby cry-ish moan-groan-screech can be a little scary when you're home alone and it's really late at night. ):

And it lasts forever! =.=

And it is NOT a turn on, hence it annoys the heck out of my peaceful life!

Oh it stopped. Good. I need not know that any living creature around me is having the time of its life.

Ps: When i mention cats, the name WOO FUI TENG did not cross my mind at all. (:

Oh how can i forget about this..

OFFICIALLY FINISHED PAINTING MY HOUSE!

I love my beautiful house, don't you love yours too? :)

Okay need to get down into business NOW!

Daily rant.

Have you ever felt the kinda emptiness deep in your heart, slowing devouring your soul, due to a problem which should never be spoken of, not anytime soon?

I am not sure why but my life recently has been surrounded by sorrow. There is a sad touch to every feeling i have, which, surprisingly, i do not dislike entirely. I do realise that sadness is part of life, probably i just embrace it too much and too willingly, it has taken its toll on me.

This problem will not end anytime soon, i suppose. *sigh*

I suddenly remember what Jo said the other day at the chatbox. Things that i have posted here are vague recently, very vague. I can imagine how these slightly sorrowful posts reflect me to anyone who is reading this, but that's what's happening around me lately. Can't help avoiding it. I'm trying to face it and trying not to despise it because hating my life will bring me no where. Is my method of embracing these complications appropriate? Hope so.

~

Went to Edu Fair today at KLCC. Went to MCKL's booth and saw a pretty senior. *wink* So who said MCKL does not have pretty girls? :D Saw many friends there! Met new ones too! And got some useful information. With these new knowledge that i have just gotten, hopefully i can make the right decision. I'm happy to share what i've got with you too. (:

Another new week, hopefully things change this week.

Yuna - Dan Sebenarnya

A wonderful this is. Take a listen if you may. :)

Hmm, new year blues?

People say that if you believe in something strong enough, it will happen, miraculously. So, if i do not believe in what i believed, will what i believed not happen?

I think it is usual. Most of the things which we hope and believe will happen, most of the good things, they will never come true. But when the things which we believe but hope not to happen, things which are unfortunate, they will be our worst nightmare.

I cannot give details here because things that happened around me are so drastic, they might be accumulated and be used as an atomic bomb strong enough to destroy my house. (That's ridiculous, i know, because how can an atomic bomb ruin only my house?) But yeah, things which are not exactly fortunate did happen, things which are bad, things which will definitely bring changes (though unsure what kinda changes), things which i do not think is beneficial. But these bad things, i think they are necessary, because after these bad things happen, then only will we get our lessons, then only we will learn from our mistakes and misdeeds. But, it will certainly be hurtful, and i dread that.

Why do i have a feeling that this would be coming? And why do i also have a feeling that the worst is yet to come? I hate these feelings. :(

Lord, is this the ultimate challenge bestowed upon us? Will this challenge bring vast changes to us? Will we find our way to a suitable solution and may everyone be at ease? May you bless us with your sagacity and your kindness. May you bless us with peace and joy.

~

Jo totally has my respect now because she can DRIVE really WELL! And she drives an AUTO! Well, not that she did not have my respect before, that's definitely not what i meant! But she was so cool today! I totally have more respect to people who can drive!

We went back to school today. Ex school, i mean. :D

It definitely did not change much. Not that i expected any vast changes. Pn Usha Diane is leaving SAB to CBN. That's practically one of the most significant changes to the school so far i think. And Pn Faridah is leaving too. She is the Agama Islam teacher. She was the advisor for Volleyball Club which i joined when i was in form one too (not that it matters). Then, all teachers are to check the attire of the students during the first period before they start classes, which in my opinion would be substituting the prefects' duties but i am not sure about the details.

And i actually talked to Pn Wan Rosna. I've never talked to her in my whole five years of high school life and today i met her and the first thing she said was, i put on weight. Which is definitely untrue. Then i talked to Pn Karimah and Pn Khairunissa. And we talked to Pn Chew too! As in Jo Stef and i. Imagine when Stef meets Pn Chew. Well, probably you cannot imagine. But it was hilarious! Conclusion would be, Pn Chew loves and misses Stefira (which is definitely unbelievable!)

And i met so many youngsters in the school! I can't believe i am no longer part of the school. I'm an ALUMNUS! Amazing! A teacher said something which i still remember, we students grow up and will eventually leave the school but teachers will grow up and never get to leave the school. Imagine their despair. Any to all the youngsters, you will all survive and be great people! (: And sorry Vivien i couldn't come find you again. Hehe.

I passed by the notice boards and saw PBSM's. I'm kinda touched to see them starting the footdrill practice already, starting next week. Good luck to you babes, you will all do fine this year :) We'll find time to come back. :)

Allison Iraheta - Scars

Listen to this song. It's really nice.

Optimism is Bliss

Have you ever been happy before? So unbelievably happy, unconsciously happy till you do not even realise that you are actually smiling like an idiot. At that second of your life, you just feel joy and bliss surfing through your soul, like a little kid, getting a tricycle for a first time, or a teenager witnessing the beauty of the beach and enjoying the sound of waves hitting the shore, unleashing its benignly alluring aura, pushing you to embrace the colossal ocean willingly with delight, pleasure and pure happiness.

But, it is only a tiny thing.

(:

I guess i just discovered something funny about myself this evening. We, or rather I, should really appreciate the times when i am really optimistic, because i do not think that we can be optimistic all the time. That, i believe, is rather impossible. So when you're looking at the world with an open arm, take that one chance and look at people around you, look at everything around you, and be grateful because of what you have, and not what have been ruined around you. Then, you will feel satisfied, joyful and grateful for having such a blessed life. You will feel happy.

No matter what becomes of me after this, at least i know that, i was once, genuinely happy.

Just Like You

That's the name of Allison Iraheta's new album. I am in love with her husky voice. Especially in the fifth track, Scars.

We all have our scars~

Am planning to find a part time job which allows me to work from home. Plan to be a part time, home based typist. But it is not easy to find that job which is not a scam. Almost fell for one before googling the name out and finding out that Lim Heng Kiap is a scam. So i did not take the risk. Hopefully of so many emails i sent out just now, some will come back with a positive reply tomorrow morning. *fingers crossed*

I wonder how was school and college for everyone today. Should be totally rockin'? And i have not returned my SPBT books! So one of these days i shall pop myself up in the school compound. I mean, ex-school. I am now an alumnus. :D

Alright time for slumber.

*Fingers crossed, wishing to earn sufficient money to support the costly college fees*

Empty, waiting to be occupied.

First day of new year my mother said to me, you finally get a rest today.
Second day of new year my mother said to me, you gotta paint the house today!
Third day of new year my mother did not say anything, so i assumed i get to rest again.

Painting does not suck. But painting for days gets boring after a while. But i still love the satisfaction i get after the work is done, when the wall is covered with a fresh colour. When the house seems anew. That's gratifying.

Yesterday when the painting was finally done at around 8pm, i was cleaning the tiles at the porch as there were paint stains on it. And it was raining. The tiles were new so i could not stand the sight of the dirty stains. So regardless of the rain, i continued cleaning the tiles. And it felt nostalgic all of the sudden. It reminded me of that last time i did something in the rain last year. It was during the practice for the foot drill competition. When the competition drew closer, i remembered us practising in the rain and that image totally brought tears to my eyes. I miss you girls. Hopefully all of you will have a smooth year this year :)

Anyway am jobless still. House work 90% done. After tomorrow or Tuesday, hopefully everything will be over. And then, i will start hunting for something to kill time. To you who have schools to attend to, good luck. :) To NS people, good luck. :) To college people, good luck too. :) I seriously think i am the only guy with nothing to do right now. *sigh*

Though am a bit late, but happy new year to all my lovely friends. :) May this new year brings joy and bliss to our lives.